BEDA Blog #23

I didn't do a whole lot today, just tried to enjoy the weather as much as possible. It was BEAUTIFUL outside. Luke realised that he had a couple of vacation days that he needed to use before he lost them, so he got off early today and won't have to work tomorrow either. We celebrated with ice cream. (see pic below) Also, it had been a while since Abby has gotten to ride in the truck, so we went for a little drive around the lake. Abby loves to sit on the middle armrest and stick her head out the back window. She was one happy dog.

Anyways, that is about all we did today. We also did a little shopping. I got some more books. I am excited about tomorrow because I will be meeting up with a friend and going to see a play. I love plays and hanging out with friends, so I'm really looking forward to it.

Also, we should be getting our first Netflix movie in the mail tomorrow.

Ok, thats all. Bye!

Jenn

BEDA Blog #22

Ok, so I feel a little better about my rant yesterday. I've had some time to calm down. This blog is going to be kind of rushed today. The reason being that I just signed up for netflix and now I have access to tons of tv shows and movies that I haven't seen in a long time that I can watch instantly, so I'm excited about that. I can't even think of anything to say because I'm so focused on picking out what I want to watch. I'll promise to be more focused tomorrow.
Jenn

BEDA Blog #21

Have you ever talked to someone and knew that they weren't listening to you. They nod their head and smile, but they have no idea what you are saying. It is very frustrating. Then, when you're done talking, they will ask a question. I think they do this to make you think that they were listening and that it's important enough that they want to know more. The problem is they ask a question, and if only they had been listening, they would already know the answer.

Lately I have been feeling this way a lot. Like everyone is talking at me (or about me), but not with me. It's a very frustrating and lonely feeling. It's like people already have this idea about who you are and what you're about. They've got you all figured out, so why look any deeper? Why actually listen to what that person has to say?

I know that I'm part of the problem. I'm too quiet and shy. I always have been. Honestly, I don't know how to be any other way. It takes a while for me to able to open up to people. I can count on one hand the people who actually know the real me. (and for the record, they seem to like me.)

Anyways, I've been trying to focus on who I really am and what I want to do with my life. I mean, there's really 3 versions of me.
1. Who people think I should be. (and for awhile I believed them)
2. Who I am right now. (confused and lonely)
3. Who I really want to be. -This is the one I am working on.

That is all I have time for now.
Jenn

BEDA Blog #20

I can't believe that I've been blogging for 20 days in a row. I'm pretty proud of myself. I'm not feeling so good today. I'll probably just be laying around for the rest of the night. I bought a couple new books, so I'm excited about that. I'm gonna go now. Hopefully I'll be feeling better tomorrow. Bye.

BEDA Blog #19 - Dreams

So, I have been having some weird dreams lately. The last one bothered me so much that when I woke up this morning I immediately went to the computer to try and find out what they meant. Now, when I was lookin up these meanings, I started to feel a little like Ron when he's trying to read Harry's tea leaves. "You're going to suffer, but you're going to be happy about it." He says something like that in the movie. You know he has no idea what that means. Anyway, thats what I felt like. So, I'm not going to take the time and tell you what my dream was because nobody ever finds your dreams as exciting as you do. I'm just going to tell you what I learned from my little quest this morning.

1. I have a set goal and know what I'm aiming for in life. My plans are right on track. (I actually have no idea what I am aiming for in life, so if my plans are on track, it is without my knowledge.)

2. I am experiencing some confrontation in my life. I may feel victimized in some situation.

3. I have some feelings of frustration. I feel a lack of control in making decisions. I might be feeling trapped or cornered.

4. I am avoiding a situation that I do not feel is conquerable.

5.I am feeling restricted in a job, health, or a relationship.

6. I may be experiencing a new state of mind or a shift in personal identity. I need to move away from my old habits and old way of thinking.

7. I am open to to acknowledging and confronting my unconscious feelings.

So, thats what I learnded about myself today. Thats all for this blog.

Jenn

BEDA Blog #18

Sorry, this is going to be another short blog. I've been gone since about 6:30 this morning and this is the first chance I've had to sit down and relax. The confrence went well. I think everyone enjoyed themselves. I think Abby has been lonely with us away so much this weekend, but we let her take a ride in the car with us today when we got back, so I think she has forgiven us. Well, I think thats all I have for today. Bye.

BEDA Blog #17

I almost forgot about this blog and I'm glad I didn't, because in about an hour I will be leaving and I don't know that I would have been back in time to write this. I'm going to a women's confrence tonight. I'm in charge of taping it, which is exciting. I've had to do that for the last 2 years, and I'm hoping that maybe I'll be better at it this time. I also have to do the same thing tomorrow because this confrence lasts 2 days. Well, I need to finish getting ready, but I will talk to you tomorrow and tell you how it went. Bye!

BEDA Blog #16

Hey guys. I'm gonna be honest with you. This blog is going to be pretty short and not because I don't have time, but because I just bought a couple of books and I really want to get to them.

This weekend is going to be a busy one for me, but I'm hoping that I still find time every day to blog. I'm sure I will.

Ok, I honestly can't think about anything but my new books right now, so I'm gonna go. See ya tomorrow.

BEDA blog #15

Today our neighbors across the street had their house broken into. I know this because a cop came to our door and asked us if we had noticed anything. We hadn't of course, but I wish that we had. It makes me sad when I hear about things like this. You work hard to buy a house and to fill it with things that you like, and then someone just comes and takes all your stuff. What right do they have to do that? At what point in their life did they come to the conclusion that it was acceptable to act like that? I'm not trying to judge them or say I'm better than them, I just would really like to know. I'd love to sit down with someone like this and ask them why they do that. Anyways, that is all for today. See ya tomorrow.

BEDA Blog #14

I didn't do much today. I just slept a lot. This week my husband has gone back to working days after almost a year of working nights. It's been difficult for me to adjust. I still seem to want to be up all night and asleep during the day. So, I slept most of the day, and now I will probably be up all night again. I don't have anything else to talk about today, so I guess I'll talk to you tomorrow.

BEDA Blog #13

Ok, so this is about the 5th time I've tried to do this blog because I was trying to figure out how to get pictures on here, and then how to get them where I wanted them. Now that it has taken me so long to figure out, I'm kind of in a hurry. I said that I would post pics from Saturday. I don't have too many because my camera was being stupid and by the time I figured out how to fix it, I was tired of trying. Here are a few of the ones that didn't come out blurry.

This is my husband.

I forget what this is, but he was close enough that I was able to take a decent picture. This was before I had figured out what was wrong with my camera.

Hippos!!

Boat!
I meant to write more than this, but I really do have to go. See you tomorrow.

BEDA Blog #12 -

I'm sorry. I said yesterday that I might put up some pictures today, but I haven't even looked at my pictures yet. Maybe tomorrow.

Today is Easter and we went to visit with DH's family. We had good food and we watched a movie. I just got home and we gave Abby her easter basket. She seems to be happy, she is playing with her new toys right now. Now she's sniffing around wondering where the rest of her easter treat is. If that sounds wierd, (and I just realized that it might) that is because Abby is our dog, not a child. Thought I should clear that up. Anyways, she loves her easter basket. Almost as much as she loves it when I start decorating for Christmas and she sees her stocking. Most people would call her spoiled, but she is the only little one in the house, so it's fun for us to give her stuff. ( I finally just got up and gave her another piece of her treat because she was starting to tear her bed apart looking for one.)

Ok, well thats not what I had planned to talk about, but thats what is going on right now. I will be back tomorrow. Bye.

BEDA Blog #11

It's been a really long day. I've had about 3 hours of sleep in the last 2 days, so this won't be a long post. We went to the zoo today. It was fun but I am tired. If I managed to get any good pictures I might post them tomorrow. My camera was being difficult, so we'll see. Anyways, that's going to have to be all for today. I have a headache. See ya tomorrow.

BEDA Blog #10

Woohoo! Double digits. Now that I've been doing this blog thing for 10 days in a row I have to say that it seems to be getting easier. I mean, it's still difficult to come up with things to write, but I don't seem to be as worried about what I'm going to write. I know it has to be done, so instead of stressing out about it I just sit down and do it. It's nice.

I have decided not to continue with the whole "10 childhood memories" thing. I just don't feel like they are very interesting. I will probably throw one in every once in a while, but doing one everyday is just starting to get boring for me.

I haven't done much today. I have been playing The Sims 2 quite a bit lately. I enjoy that game, but sometimes it can get boring. I don't have any expansion packs, so I'm sure that would help, but I don't really like them. Anyways, now I'm just rambling. That's all for today. I will see ya tomorrow.

Childhood Memory #2 - Hats

When I was younger I didn’t like hats. Specifically hats with strings that you had to tie. I was always afraid that I wouldn’t be able to get it untied and then I had have to keep the hat forever. The only problem with that (besides having the same hat on your head for the rest of your life) was that I figured as I got older the hat would start to choke me, and I didn’t want to die. So, my solution was when my mom would tie the strings on my hat I would stick my hand under my chin and my mom would tie it under my hand and then I would move my hand. This meant that my hat was loose, but it also meant that I could slip it off if for some reason I couldn’t get it untied. Anyways, I realize now that I worse case scenario I could have always cut the strings, but I wasn’t thinking about that when I was 5.

That’s it for today. I know it’s not terribly interesting, but I said I would do 10 things and this is one of them. Also, I don’t have anything else to talk about right now. See ya tomorrow.

Childhood Memory # 1 - The safe way to ride a horse.

When I was a child my safety was important to me. I went to great lengths to not get hurt. Looking back now, I wonder what exactly the thought process was behind some of my actions. This is the story of one of those times.
Now, I haven’t seen one in a long time, but I’m sure you all remember the mechanical horses that used to be in Wal-Mart. Maybe your Wal-Mart still has the horse. Either way, you know the one I’m talking about. Front legs stretched out in front and back legs stretched out in back. It had a saddle on its back and a crazed look in its eye. Yeah, that’s the one. In my store the horse was on the inside of the store along the wall across from the check-outs. You couldn’t help but pass it on your way to the doors. Like every other kid I would stop and ask for a quarter and if mom wouldn’t fork it over, then grandma usually would. Now, most kids would probably just hop right on, put their feet in the stirrups, throw the quarter in, and ride, but not me. I took a more cautious approach. First, when I sat on the horse I didn’t sit with one leg on either side like you were supposed to. What if something happened? What if the horse went crazy and I needed to jump off? I can’t jump if my feet are all tangled in the stirrups can I? Nope. I had to sit on it sideways. One hand on the reins and one hand on the back of the saddle. It was safer that way. That wasn‘t the only precaution I took. Remember when you would put your money in and the horse would come to life with a quick jolt before getting into a nice rhythm? Well, I didn’t like that jolt. I could just imagine me losing my grip and falling backwards of the horse. (Because of the way I was sitting.) So what I would do is I would put the money into the machine, wait for the horse to start, and then once it was moving I would climb onto, sitting sideways the way I described above.
Of course, now I realize that my way of riding the horse was much more dangerous than the normal way. What I want know is what my mother was doing while I was wrestling with the horse. I plan on asking her the next time I see her.
Well, that’s all I have for today. I hope you found it a little more interesting than my other posts. See ya tomorrow.

Day #7

So, I realized today that I need to do something to make this blog a little more interesting. If you haven't figured it out by now, my day-to-day life really is not very exciting. Sometimes when I'm bored my mind will wander to the past and I start to think about when I was a kid. I had a pretty active imagination when I was a kid, which resulted in me being afraid of quite a few things. Or, sometimes I would just do normal things differently because of that fear. I thought it would be fun to share some of those things with you. I have made a list of 10 things that I remember from my childhood. Some of them are things that I was afraid of, some are things that I believed, and some are just wierd things that I did that really make no sense now that I am older. I'm hoping that you find them interesting, and maybe they will bring back parts of your childhood that you had forgotten. Starting tomorrow, I will post one thing from my list everyday for the next 10 days. See ya tomorrow.

Day 6

It's been a pretty boring day today. I slept late. Then I read my book for a little bit. Then I ate food. Then I read some more. Then I got online and looked up some stuff and checked my email. Then I realized I had 2 hours left to write my blog for BEDA. So, that is what I'm doing. Now, I need to go and fold laundry. I will be back tomorrow. Hopefully, with something a little more interesting to talk about.

Day 5

I really don't have anything too exciting planned for the blog today. Ok well, actually, up until 2 minutes ago I didn't have anything at all planned. I didn't get to bed until late this morning and I didn't wake up till about 6:00pm. So, I am kinda tired and I thought this would be a good chance to try another survey. This one is a little shorter, but I just grabbed one of the first ones I found. So...here it goes.


Where are you right now? At home

What do you wish you were doing right now?Reading my new book.

What shirt are you wearing right now?Yellow hoodie (over a white t-shirt)

What are you eating right now? I'm not eating anything right now, but I'm thinking about eating a Rice Krispie Treat.

What room are you in right now? I am in the Living Room.

What underwear are you wearing right now? The normal kind? ( I wasn't expecting that question)

What are you listening to right now? Eve 6

What pants are you wearing right now? Jeans (Gap jeans if it matters)

What shoes are you wearing right now? I'm not wearing any shoes.

What socks are you wearing right now? normal white ones. Hanes.

Who do you wish you were with right now? I'm pretty happy where I'm at.

What time is it right now? 8:45pm

What is one thing you would change right now? Can't think of anything right now.

What is next to you right now? My ipod.

What will you do next right now?Read some other blogs, update twitter, maybe play sims or read.


Ok, I know that wasn't terribly exciting, but it's all I've got for today. I promise that I will get better. See ya tomorrow.

Day #4 - I CAN'T HEAR YOU

Well, Day 4 here we are! So far I have really enjoyed blogging, but it has helped me realize something. I really am not a very interesting person. Maybe that's not entirely true, but it feels that way when I sit down to write a blog. I have all these grand ideas of what I'm going to write and how my posts are going to be, but then I sit down and....nothing. Why is that?

Anyways, if you're wondering about the title, it's what I have to keep saying to my husband. I'm sitting in the living room trying to come up with something... anything to write for this blog and he's across from me making all kinds of noises. It's very distracting. Then, he talks and talks...not that I don't like to talk to my husband, but I'm kinda busy. I don't care about the game he's playing, the maps he's downloading, how cute our dog is, or the rain outside. I just want to finish my post on this blog so I can be done with it. (...that is, until tomorrow) So, I turn to my ipod. Now with the Ramones blaring in my ears and can't hear my husband, and hopefully will be able to finish this post in peace.

Oh hold on a sec....."WHAT HONEY? I CAN'T HEAR YOU?".......


Lol. See ya tomorrow.